relationships

I'm ready to give more time to my friendships, I miss my friends.

anger

so, what can I say, I am feeling uneasy most of the time. Not quite myself. It is becoming more and more obvious that I have work to do. For the last few years I thought I was doing my work, moving past things, being a microwave. Letting things go. What I have realized is that there was no resolution, no work, just stuffing. I am a master stuffer. I hide in food, I hide in sweetness. I hide in words. I am full of anger, and can't hold it anymore, it hurts, and I can't hold it in. I am quick to be mad, I am not letting things go quickly. It lasts for weeks, sometimes longer.

I can't lose weight because as soon as I lose it, I stuff something else. I am ready to doing to shifting and moving. where do I go? what do I do? really, I'm asking. I hurt, I want something else for me, I can't do this anymore. It's affecting my health and my sanity.

That Stupid Little Piece of Paper

I need to be challenged at Challenger, how ironic. I love my job, I LOVE it, and I have become so efficient that I am getting bored. I felt so good today because I was busy all day, I felt needed, I had important things to do. I need tasks, I need something to keep me busy. I can't be stagnate. My boss was out for two days last week and all hell broke lose, it was fun and invigorating, being the boss, running the show. I had more things to do, I was the bottom line. I love my boss, and I love working with her. We are a fantastic team. We have been taking names, and picking up slack. I want more responsibility.

At the end of this school year my Headmaster is leaving, in a perfect world the Elementary Director would become the Headmaster, the Preschool Director would become the Elementary Director, and I would be the new Preschool Director. As it happens, the Elementary Director wants to stay put, the Preschool Director wants to stay put, and I need a four year degree to be the Headmaster (which would not be my first choice of jobs anyway). So, I will stay right where I am for now, and get started on what my friend lovingly calls "that stupid little piece of paper", so I can advance and be great.

So, again, Love my job, need more challenge, need a paper.

It's official...

But not what you think...hehehe.

I have officially moved all (well 99%) of my stuff to Jessica's house. Now the big question is....where are we going to put all of my stuff. Currently most of my stuff is in bins in Jessica's "closet", this week will consist of consolidating, and organizing.

So I made it through the move with a slightly sore back, my car slightly worse for wear, but all in all, mission accomplished. :)

hurt me, go on, i'll let you...

I am frustrated, not with what you have done, I love you, but with the situation you have put me in. How dare you give me your garbage to carry, how dare you put my job at stake, how dare you think that it is okay to ask me to do something that you know I wont say no to, but that hurts me to do. I'm angry and annoyed. Then you think you can buy me off, that drinks, and smiles, and kind words will fix it. Am I just someone to use, or are we friends. Don't ask to buy me lunch, don't wink at me, I'm not okay with what I have done for you. I'm not okay with it. I feel used. I don't like it.

Word Picture

I am a ship at sea without a heading. Packed with supplies to last a long time. Everything functioning properly. Captain is happy, crew is happy. No signs of danger. No sign of land. Content, but ultimately without purpose. Sailing along the beautiful ocean. Birds are flying, the sky is a most amazing shade of blue. White puffy clouds. Nowhere in particular to go.

I pretty much Rock!

So I am pretty much kick ass at my job. There are a lot of reasons why, but here are just a few highlights from the last week.

-I have completely organized 6 large storage closets, 8 filing cabinets, 1 workroom, 8 supply cupboards, and my desk.
-I turn in my payroll 7.5 hours early every pay period.
-I have registered 300 students for the new school year, taken payments and set up direct debit authorizations for all of their parents, made new files for each student, and organized them into classrooms with student bags, and visor cards.
-Kept my supervisors sane.
-Come up with fun back to school gifts for each teacher.
-Scheduled all my teachers in the computer with schedules and class assignments.
-Taught a class that I wasn't assigned to at the corporate training this last week at the drop of a hat, and still managed to finish payroll.
-Opened, and put away 472 boxes of supplies for classrooms.
-Deep cleared and sanitized 8 classrooms.
-Gave 6 campus tours to prospective parents and students.
-1 placement test for a new student going into Elementary (mind you, I have only ever taught/worked in the Preschool).
-Did all of this in 43 hours!

Hells Yes!